Friend:  Um, at this point whenever I start looking at jobs I start feeling an impending sense of doom and wondering how bad it will really be when i have to live in a homeless shelter.

Roomie 1: Dude, I just got turned down for donating plasma.  

Friend:  And not even that, i'm going to be like will smith living in a bathroom, but there won't be a cute kid there telling me it will all be okay and i'm probably not as smart as the guy he was playing in that movie, so basically i'll live in a bathroom and die from sepsis or something.  I'm not even sure what sepsis is but it sounds gross.

Roomie 1:  Oh man.  I'll be there in that bathroom with you and I promise to tell you it will all be ok.  But it definitely won't.  Especially when we get sepsis.

Friend:  Law school was a poor call.

Roomiw 1: Most def.