friend: how does this shit happen to us???
roomie: i don't know. oh and my entire toenail then fell off. the whole thing in one chunk.
friend: u r gross
friend: sorry a 15 year old girl stole my phone.
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also known as: stupid stuff my unemployed friend and i say to each other across the 2000 mile abyss that so wrongly separates us my totally employed friend and I say during our endless text conversations we have while trying to do as little actual work as possible without getting fired
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