friend: do you seriously eat cupcakes for dinner?
roomie: yes. one for breakfast and one for dinner for 6 days, that makes 12. and on the 7th day i make a new batch. but now...
friend: okay, do you eat ANYTHING else?
roomie: i eat lunch.
friend: a legit lunch?
roomie: sometimes a boca burger for dinner dessert in reverse.
friend: do you eat snacks?
roomie: yea a legit lunch. lol. i get a monster salad or i go out to eat at a restaurant.
friend: how are you not 500 lbs?
roomie: and i clean that fucking plate. i don't know. magic. they are meth cupcakes?
friend: so just so we're clear... you eat 2 cupcakes a day and a legit lunch and don't work out.... i eat healthy food at regular intervals and workout 5 days a week... and YOU are the one who loses weight. That sum things up correctly?
roomie: um... yes. that sums it up. i drink a lot of soda too.
friend: when you die of complications from diabetes can i have your clothes? i hate you.
roomie: yes. lol. i know.
friend: they're probably too small for me. since i'm a fat ass.
roomie: i'm not toned at all if that helps.
friend: whatever.
roomie: i'm not pretty nekkid.
friend: you prob weigh less than i do.
roomie: because it is all fat.
friend: and you eat cupcakes.
roomie: i seriously jiggle.
friend: i fucking love cupcakes. i might eat a dozen on easter.
roomie: well give up lunch and dinner and you can eat two cupcakes a day too.
friend: like, fuck ham, make me some effing cupcakes.
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